Lots of tests of love over these days

Bishop Scott Bullock
The Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph
December 28, 2025

A couple of years ago while I was still a pastor in Iowa, on Christmas Eve, a family showed up for the five p.m. Mass at the parish at about 4:49 and 30 seconds, something like that. You know what that means — probably there were no seats left. It was clear that this had been an anxious time, before their arrival, trying to get the whole crew ready for Mass. I won’t give many more details, but the mom suggested that, even on the way, patience and kindness were in short supply. In any case, while it had been their intention as a family to get dressed up in their most special clothing, it did not happen. The mother of the family, exasperated, said to me, “I’m so sorry we’re all in jeans. You can’t believe what’s gone on, just trying to get this bunch here!” 

I assured them I was happy they had made it!  She concluded, “Yes, we really wanted to dress special for this special day, but I guess how we’re dressed isn’t the most important thing.” 

In some ways, this is very true. But, in a deeper sense, how we’re dressed is very important. 

On this Feast of the Holy Family, the church chooses for our second reading a reading from the third chapter of the Letter to the Colossians, which is completely and totally about the importance of how we dress.  One biblical verse, Colossians 3:12, says it all, “Put on, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”

The verse begins with the biblical word, for us translated “put on.” It literally means “be clothed” or “get dressed.” The idea is that of choosing what we wear. And St. Paul tells us, as members of God’s chosen family, to wear five things: heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, generosity, and patience. These are the garments we must wear, if we claim to live a life according to the teachings of Jesus.

First put on compassion. The sense in the biblical word is a deep feeling about someone’s difficulty or misfortune. It is as if our very core, very viscera, are stirred with deep feelings. If another is struggling, we join them in the struggle, our minds, eyes, hearts focused not on our own struggles but the struggles of others. That’s what it means to “put on” compassion — to focus on the struggles of others, rather than our own.

Next, put on kindness. This sense of this biblical word, this kindness, is acting in a way that is useful for others. In other words, I meet the real needs of the other, not my own needs. This is what it means to “put on” kindness. To be completely concerned, not for what I need, but what others need. In this essence, this is what we mean by love — willing the good of the other and not of ourselves. 

We are next to put on humility. The biblical word means the opposite of pride in oneself. Specifically, one sees oneself as lowly in relation to God. When we remember who God is, it is the appropriate response is humility — the truth that we are low in comparison to the high, almighty God. And, since Jesus told us that “whatever you do to the least of my brothers you do to me,” so the humble person, seeing God in the other, chooses the lower place before each and every other human being.

The next clothing is gentleness. The biblical clothing expresses power with reserve. Gentleness begins with the Lord’s inspiration and finishes by acting with power. This is a determined gentleness. Power can destroy but the gentle person reserves power only to serve the needs of the other. 

And the final clothing is patience. This is a long-suffering that does not give into anger but chooses to bear another’s burden for the sake of that other — another aspect of love.

So to be properly dressed as family members of Christ, we are then to be more focused and concerned with other family members than myself. If we look at the breakdown of any family, we won’t have to look too long to find persons not looking out for the good of the other, but seeking what is primarily their own needs and what that person wants.  

So, does how we dress matter? If we think about the kind of dressing that St. Paul speaks about, “putting on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience,” then it certainly does matter if we want to show Christ, the perfect Compassion of God, to others. But how do we do it? 

Monks in monasteries speak about the clothing they wear as “habits.” Habits — that’s how we too are to dress ourselves too — a dressing that is much easier if God helps. How do habits work? By practicing compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, always for the good of others. 

With lots of family time these days, with lots of tests of love over these days, maybe you too come to church today not dressed with these habits, but looking for help. Well, good news! You’ve come to the right place. For no matter how your hearts might be dressed, notice that Paul is ready, as he preaches, to tell us how we can put on these other good needs. In a nutshell, this is the Christian definition of love — choosing the good of the other for that other’s sake. Dressed like that, dressed like Christ, then we’re ready to love others in the true family of God.  

So, today, once again, let us come to our teacher, our Eucharistic teacher, who is perfection in love. As we receive goodness itself, may we with his help put on the habits of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Clothed like that, it will truly matter how we are dressed. It will matter very much for others who receive life and love through us.