By Becky Berreth

   Filomena came to Hogar Refugio de Misericordia (Refuge of Mercy) pregnant and alone. Her family wanted nothing to do with her when they learned she was pregnant. She was abandoned on the streets of Santiago, Chile, until her aunt told her of the refuge.

   The Refuge of Mercy is a home for unwed, adolescent mothers founded by the Congregation of Most Merciful Love in 1927. It was built as a sanctuary for teenage mothers who have little or no help from their families. Young mothers, some only eleven years of age, receive pre- and postnatal care, psychological, physical, and spiritual help as well as a safe home, food and clothing. To be accepted at the refuge, girls must be under the age of 18, have nowhere else to go, and be experiencing their first pregnancy.

The new cottages were built in 2000 to give the refuge a more homelike feel. (Below-Right) Sister Yvette Mallow helps Nadine, 15, study English for her GED. The Chilean government wants every one to be bilingual by the year 2012. Nadine’s baby was born April 2006. (Photos courtesy of Sister Yvette Mallow)

    In 2000, five new cottages were built to create a homelike setting. Four girls live in a cottage so they can live as a “family.” Facilities also include a laundry, kitchen, and living quarters for the sisters.

    The sisters strive to educate and to provide the young mothers with the support they need during and immediately following pregnancy. The girls learn about being a mother and providing a stable environment for their child. They also learn skills that will help them to find a job, to live on their own, and to be emotionally supportive of their new family.

    The mother may stay at the refuge until the child is one year old, unless there are other extenuating circumstances. Since 97 percent of the girls are there because of rape or incest, a social worker visits with the girl’s family to determine if it is safe to return to the house. Some of the older girls are able to be on their own, but the younger girls, if they cannot go back home, are placed with another family member or mother and baby are placed in separate children’s homes.

   “I went with a social worker once. In the first house, the mother made arrangements to protect her daughter from the baby’s father,” said Sister Yvette Mallow, OSB. “So they could go home, but at the next house the mother chose her boyfriend (the father of the grandchild) over her own daughter and granddaughter. ”

    Sister Mallow first learned of the refuge in 1972 when Pope Paul VI asked Catholic colleges to sponsor a sister from South America. Sister Mallow was finishing her BA at Holy Family College in Manitowoc, Wis., when she met Sister Maria Gloria. While helping Sister Gloria with her English, the two became friends. Sister Gloria even spent the following summer at St. Martin Monastery.

   “At that point I was 32 and full of enthusiasm about going to a foreign country,” recalled Sister Mallow. “I really wanted to be a missionary; however, Gloria said I could not go to Chile because the political situation was too dangerous.”

    It was 20 years before she could see her friend again; however, Sister Mallow refused to let the political situation control her new friendship, and the two kept in touch by writing letters. Sister Mallow did not speak, read, or write Spanish very well, making communication difficult. “Just because I helped her with English did not mean I learned Spanish,” she said. “I would write the letter in English, grab my Spanish/English Dictionary and write the exact wording in Spanish underneath. I did not know it was gibberish.”

    Twenty years later, a friend took Sister Mallow to lunch and gave her a ticket to anywhere in the world. She immediately called Sister Gloria but learned that she would have to wait two weeks to find out if General Augusto Pinochet Ugarte would be voted out of office. Sister Mallow described how he took control of Chile in 1973 in a violent coup. Pinochet’s regime was littered with serious human rights violations and random executions. More than three thousand people were killed and over 30,000 fled the country. It was during that time that the sisters would pull bodies from the river and bury them – an illegal act that could have led to their own executions.

   “I was so excited. I had waited 20 years to go to Chile, and now there was the possibility of waiting only two more weeks,” she remembered. “I waited for democracy to take hold, and the next year I went for a month and stayed for two years.”

    In 1998 she returned again for two years and has gone once a year for a one-month visit since 2000. When she is not traveling, she is busy writing grants for the refuge. In October 2005, she started the Merciful Love Connection, a non-profit group to help fund the refuge.

    She, along with the other nuns at the refuge, compiled two lists: necessities and dreams. Necessities included hiring a computer teacher, adding a reading and writing tutor, updating the laundry facilities, making a sidewalk to connect the cottages with the main building, and providing each girl with a care package. Dreams for the refuge include hiring another house mother, offering various workshops, providing office space for the social worker and psychologist, quarters for the house mothers, and a well baby clinic.

   Filomena realized the value of a stable environment for her child. She took jobs around the refuge and saved every peso she earned. Because she had no one, she was allowed to stay at the refuge until she finished high school. After she finished, she took a job as a live-in maid, placing her son in a children’s home during the week. Soon she had enough money for subsidized housing; however, after making her third house payment, she lost her job. She returned to the refuge and asked to work in the kitchen. The sisters cleaned out a store room for her and her son and allowed her to live there as long as she attended school. In July, Filomena completed a program in international cooking and is looking for a job so she can move into her home with her son.